WADE K. MEYER, M.Ed.

The Bus Trip

I wish to offer my compliments to a COTA driver. COTA stands for the Central Ohio Transit Authority.  Recently I have had to ride the bus.  I have been overall very pleased with the professionalism and courtesy of the drivers. 

On Friday, January 18, 2008, mid-morning, I boarded the Number 2 atHenderson and High, heading into the downtown.  At the stop I met some people who worked with Columbus Public Schools.  We started chatting at the bus stop and continued our polite conversation on the bus.  After they left, a gentleman boarded the bus.  He was in a wheelchair, necessary because he had one leg apparently amputated.  The driver secured him. In order to make room, an Ohio State student moved, and sat next to me. 

The student had overheard that I was a college prof, and asked me if I could tell him the difference between linguistics and semantics. We kept the discussion professional, quiet and appropriate. Within a few minutes, the gentleman rider started yelling at the COTA driver. It took both of us a few minutes to realize that he was yelling at her because she was allowing "smart" people to have a "smart" discussion on her bus. Unbelievable. She politely told him that we were not being loud and that the conversation was not inappropriate. He continued yelling at her and started yelling at us because we "smart people" didn't know anything, and that we had no common sense, and that we needed to spend time in the "hood" to know "anything." I have left out his colorful language.  She firmly yet politely and professionally reminded him that our conversation was appropriate, and that if he didn't cease his tirade she would be forced to ask him to leave the bus.  He profanely and vocally told her that he didn't need to be on a bus with smart people, and to let him off at the next stop. She stopped the bus. He tried to rip his wheelchair out of the restraint.  While doing so, the open, apparently alcoholic container in his coat pocket started spilling out his beverage on the floor, and it continued to spill as he left the bus. 

Out of respect for COTA, the driver, and just manners in general, neither the student nor I said anything to the poorly-mannered gentleman.  The driver should be commended for her professionalism.  She contacted I assumed someone at COTA to inform her or him that she needed to replace the bus (the beverage made the bus stink).  I am not sure what other report she made. 

The most disturbing part of this incident is the vocal gentleman’s lack of manners, and his lack of self-control.  I have been on many occasions criticized because of my staunch position that a significant problem with our society is its willingness to accept, patronize or tolerate public displays of a lack of self control.  I would really like to hear from my readers.  I would like to restrict the comments to the behavior of adults.  I would like to avoid comments which are derogatory towards the actions of children or the upbringing of specific people. 

Here is my position: In this instance, the gentleman was out of line. It doesn’t matter how his Mom or Dad raised him, or how he feels about the government, or how he has a right to behave inappropriately because he is wheelchair-bound and has to use a public transportation system.  He would have a right to complain if we were using foul language, or being so loud that we were disturbing the other patrons.  He would have a right if we were threatening other patrons.  People seem to think they have to right to vocalize their opinions, regardless of subject or situation.  I say they are wrong.  Do you see an injustice?  Do you see an elderly person being mistreated? Do you see a child being mistreated? Do you see a special needs person being denied something that he or she should not be denied?  Speak up!  But I overheard a discussion between two women on the merits of vegetarianism. I agreed with one, not the other. Not my discussion.  I stayed out.  A gentleman started asking me questions about my opinions of the weather, which led to his concerns over the presidential race.  I acknowledged that it was cold and that it would be an interesting year in politics. When I got off the bus, I said, “Thank you, have a great day.” Nothing more needs to be said.  There was an old expression that said, “Children should be seen and not heard.”  I would extend that to all people.  Benjamin Franklin, in his list of thirteen virtues upon which one should focus to obtain Moral Perfection, cited the second of these thirteen as, “SILENCE. Speak not but what may benefit others or yourself; avoid trifling conversation.”  Ben, I couldn’t agree more.

Comments?

© 2008, Wade K. Meyer, M.Ed. All Rights Reserved.

Wade K. Meyer, M.Ed. is a parent, college professor and writer. He is also a board member of the Center for Effective Discipline,Columbus, Ohio.  www.wademeyer.com, email at wademeyer@wademeyer.com.